Tel: 07576 786467
Email: emma@emmakharper.com

How I became a Psychosexual Somatics® Therapist

How I became a psychosexual somatics therapist

I didn't land in this career by accident. I've always found it fascinating what it means to be a Human.

Reading Human Sciences at Oxford University and Sustainable Business Development as a Post-Grad at Cambridge I retired from 12 years in the Business World at 33 with a Black Belt in Kickboxing and a commitment to putting my genius to better use than helping big businesses make big money. I felt called to support the rebalancing of Masculine and Feminine energies on this planet, although I didn't even know what that meant at the time. Some might call it a Spiritual Awakening. At the time I called it a nervous breakthrough.

With a 15 year relationship under my belt, and a decent stint as a single woman blogging about my exploits on Tinder whilst having a plethora of fascinating sexual encounters with other humans, sometimes more than one at a time, plus the occasional celebrity, not to mention long periods of celebacy, it was just a matter of time before my fascination in how we all related to one other developed into something more purposeful.

My personal search for joy and meaning in life took me to California where, under mentorship from Lissa Rankin MD (renound Author, speaker and Spiritual teacher) and Anne Davin PHD, Depth Psychologist, I discovered a passion for human relating, sexuality, creation and the quantum realm.

I was quickly then connected to Mike Lousada, Louise Mazanti and the PsychoSexual Somatics teaching faculty back in London just in time to support a deeply growing need in me to develop understanding of what the heck was going on in my own psyche and sexuality and how my inner and outer worlds connected and informed each other.

During my training I soon started to notice in myself certain repeating patterns, certain odd physiological and psychological responses to sexual scenarios and advances from others. I discovered myself doing things i didn't want to do, freezing and not saying "No". I discovered myself unable to ask for what I wanted or even to tune into what that was in the first place. I found myself in power struggles and games of sexual manipulation. 

I noticed myself frequently dissociating, or going into uncontrollable thinking whilst loosing access to the feeling sensations of my body. I noticed when I stayed present to my body and my feelings I could experience powerful syncronisities, perform sex magic and be the creator of my own reality. When I lost presence I stopped feeling safe in the world. I noticed how little pleasure I could actually tolerate in my body and in my life before I got overwhelmed and checked out or began to saboutage things.

Soon it became clear it was time to commit to living consistently inside and in harmony with my own body and it was time to get really curious about anything was stopping me from doing that.

I took on additional mentoring and Sex Coaching with my dear friend William Van Vechten to support me to further re-pattern my sexual neurology and increase my tolerance for my own Life-Force.

I became a woman obsessed with my own childhood and adult trauma and how it has informed how I'm showing up in every moment and I remain so today. There isn't a day goes by where I don't learn something new about my own nervous system and how my programming is preventing me from having access to the full love, connection and life-force that is available to me in this lifetime.

Every day I evolve and every day I have more access to Life-Force than I did the day before. I marvel at the potentiality of my sensing, intuition and the capacity of my body to channel something bigger than me when conditions align, especially through dance and sex.

With this expansion I watch my life continue to blossom open, pregnant with possibility in every moment and I'm surrounded by love, magic and miracles.

I may not have a Disney-esque marriage and the answers to all Life's questions, yet I do have consistency and expansiveness in my sexuality and my life.

The consistent thread is me.

  • I remain passionate about Sexuality, Integrity and Freedom.
  • I'm passionate about helping others to fulfill their potential and become really Potent in the world.
  • I'm passionate about really exciting and healing sexual experiences on that journey.
  • I'm passionate about You moving through whatever is blocking You bringing yourself fully to this experience we call life.

The rest of the story is still to be written.

"Curious, compassionate, wise, and enthusiastic are words I'd use to describe Emma.  I've been so blessed to know her and to evolve in her presence.  I'm grateful for her many contributions to my aliveness!"

Yum Van Vechten